The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.

When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.

The man who writes about himself and his own time is the only man who writes about all people and all time.

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

Censorship ends in logical completeness when nobody is allowed to read any books except the books that nobody reads.

"Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

"My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world."

The quality of a play is the quality of its ideas.

"You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul." (Back to Methuselah)

"I'm sorry this letter is so long, I didn't have time to make it shorter."